What has already worked

Until someone proves me wrong, I’m not changing a single thing about anything what I’m already doing. There’s a strict pattern in this, and has been in place for a long time before. I have lifted thing weight once myself and manage to keep it up. Other time I have given it to others, and when they left, it collapsed on me. There’s no other way than to do only what has already worked in the past and do it myself one more time. Just one more time the same, just bring on a bigger portion, please! I need to find the inner anger and the inner hunger to have more of it.